Duhduh...duhduh... (Jaws Theme)

So this upcoming Fall semester I am taking Communication 114. Or Speech class. And I’m dreading it. Occasionally, I will start thinking about it and wonder how I will do. You’d think, considering how much I love to talk, that it would be a cinch, but I abhor public speaking.

I get shaky and sweaty (two of my favorite things - *roll of eyes*) and I feel my voice shaking. It’s always been that way… with the exception of the last talk I gave at a Realtor meeting after I had given my notice when I worked at Chicago Title. That is the only time that I can remember feeling comfortable in front of a group of people. And I found it ironic, I found that comfort when I was leaving… or maybe it was because I was leaving that it made it easy for me.

So today as I was getting around, I start thinking…wondering…slightly stressing… about what speeches I will be forced to make in front of a class of 18 – 19 year olds.

And, what worries me the most is my penchant for going off on tangents.

Exhibit A: ABC Workshop May 7, 2011. Spent the night before planning out our activities, what I would say, where I would break, when Candice would speak, yadda yadda yadda. Then what did I do? I did not use any of my notes and just free-balled it. Yes I just wrote free-balled.

Anywho, that’s all fine and dandy for workshops because I’m speaking from my heart and about something I’m extremely passionate about and I’m surrounded by people who share that passion… and I don’t have a stopwatch timing me like I will in speech class.

I remember in speech class in 10th or 11th grade I had to do a newscast including weather, sports etc. I went so over the time I was told I could just stop. Talk about mortifying. I feel embarrassed even sharing that, but it perhaps explains my worry.

So back to earlier today as I’m straightening my fabulous blonde hair, I think, well what if I have to introduce myself? What would I say?

Fake Speech (running through my mind):

“Hi there, my name is Cari Adams and I’m 33 or 34, or perhaps by now even 35. I’m a mom of twins + 1, a fiancé, a sophomore, a Realtor, an office manager and a co-founder of a non-profit organization called Anti-Bullying Coalition. I’m opinionated, bordering on obnoxious and am always rushing somewhere. I have 3 delightful doggies and 4 ornery kitties that all neurotically love my fiancé. I love to laugh, am obsessed with Facebook and squeal every time I see Usher. I adore Ellen DeGeneres and everything she stands for and one day we will meet and become BFF’s.”

How long would that take? How many extra sentences would I throw in there?

So probably when you first started reading this, you thought Isn’t it summer? Doesn’t she have 2 - 3 months before stressing about her fall classes? And yes, you are right. I’m thinking maybe I just have to have something to worry about…. And this is what was convenient today. I don't choose it, they just come to me :).